motivate

Ways To Boost Your Self Esteem After Making Bad Comparisons

By

If you are someone that keeps making bad comparisons with others that make you feel negatively about yourself then your self esteem is going to be low. When you see that your neighbor has a brand new car and your car is years old then you can go into a negative spiral which will lower your self esteem dramatically.

You start to question your worth. “Why don’t I earn enough money to buy a new car?” and other similar thoughts fill your head. This is not rational behavior as you don’t know the full story. Your neighbor might have received the car as part of his job or even leased it. All you are focusing on is the pain and the fact that you are not good enough.

So if you find yourself in a situation like this how can you boost your self esteem so that you stop having such a low opinion of yourself which makes you feel terrible? We have some great techniques for you in this article.

List your previous Achievements

We have all achieved a number of things in our lives and often don’t give ourselves any credit for doing this. Just because millions of other people passed their driving test doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t give yourself credit for doing this too.

Take some time out and write down some of your past achievements. If you had to overcome a number of challenges to achieve something then these need to be on your list. It doesn’t matter how insignificant you think these achievements are. Just write them down and reflect on how well you did.

Stop Dwelling in the Past

Something that will definitely affect your self esteem in the wrong way is to dwell on the past mistakes you have made. Everyone makes mistakes but people with high self esteem learn from their mistakes and move on. They don’t keep raking up the past so that it influences their future.

A lot of people believe that if they tried something once and failed that they will never be able to do this in the future. Do you think like this? So if you wanted to learn Spanish in the past and gave up after a few days this means that you will never be able to learn Spanish. This is just ridiculous and you are letting your past rule you.

Look your Best

A lot of people with low self esteem get to the point where they do not care how they present themselves to the world. If you are a man then maybe you haven’t had a shave for a few days and you look terrible.

To give yourself a much needed boost shave off that horrible stubble now and put on some nice clothes. If you are a woman then get your hair done or your nails. Buy some new clothes that you can wear outside with pride. This will give your self esteem a much needed boost.

Don’t let Fear hold you back

We all have irrational fears that we carry around with us. People with low self esteem can have a lot more of these than others do. The best way to boost your self esteem in this situation is to tackle a fear head on and do it anyway.

This is not going to be easy for you but once you have challenged this fear and done something that scared you before you will feel so much better about yourself. So identify an irrational fear today and just go for it!

How To Stop Being Dependent On Others For Your Happiness

By

People often get confused about what over dependency really is. It is perfectly natural and healthy to want to be in a loving relationship with someone. You are dependent on their love and they are dependent on theirs.

There are a lot of couples where one of the partners works to earn money while the other stays at home and takes care of the children. This is fine too as long as both partners have an equal say in the relationship and a level of independence to pursue their own goals and dreams.

What is not healthy is being overly dependent on someone, or even a group of people, for your happiness and contentment. If you feel obliged to spend all of your time and energy making someone else happy so that you can be happy then this is not a healthy situation.

A lot of people in this situation become obsessed about the thoughts that others have of them. They are constantly trying to please another person in order to have peace of mind. Before long this can really spiral out of control and you can find yourself overly dependent on another individual.

So if you are in this situation just how do you get out of it? Well you can get out of it but it will take some time and effort on your part. Here are some recommended ways that you can use to gradually free yourself from over dependence.

Improve your Self Worth

Depending on others for your happiness is usually a sign that a person’s self worth is very low. Nobody should have to be dependent on someone else to feel happy and alive. By increasing your self worth you will gradually alleviate the need for this dependency.

Think about what you have achieved in your life so far so that you can identify your strengths. People with low self worth often say that they do not have any strengths but this is not true at all.

If you are influenced too much by what others think then you may have even developed skills just to please them. These skills do nothing for your self worth or independence. So think about what you have achieved for you in your life and reflect on these to give you a boost.

Look for Happiness within rather than outside

A lot of people are conditioned to believe that they can only be happy if they only have certain things around them – which includes people. For some, having a lot of possessions is the key to happiness.

But all of these things are really doing is filling a hole in your life. It is better to look for happiness within yourself. That way if you lost everything tomorrow you can still be happy. Consider meditation as an effective way to do this.

Be at ease with yourself

How do you feel about spending time alone? Does this make you uncomfortable? Everyone should be at ease spending time alone. If you have a problem with this then you need to deliberately find ways to be on your own and become more comfortable with this.

Take Responsibility for your Life

To lessen your dependency on others you need to take responsibility for your life. Tell yourself that you are responsible for your happiness and how your life will pan out in the future. Set yourself some goals and do things your way.

Effective After School Activities

By

When there are so many activities on offer, and each one looks as good as the next, how do you gauge the worth and effectiveness of these activities? Sure, you want an activity that junior enjoys. But we really
cannot afford to waste time on pleasure for pleasure’s sake, do we? There needs to be a grain of gold somewhere in there. Given below is a list of characteristics that any good after school activity must possess.

Clarity in objectives and goals is the first important thing. What does the course offer? How does it propose to achieve the results? How many kids make up a batch? Ask questions. After all, when you are dishing out the dough, you really need to understand what you are getting in return.

A good after school activity will provide lots of opportunities for the young to increase their level of understanding of complex concepts. This is true of recreational activities too. Learning to pitch a ball, or dance to a tune – regardless of the activity involved, the child should be encouraged to grapple with and conquer new concepts. This not only keeps boredom at bay by challenging the child, but also builds up his self-confidence. Development of academic, personal and social skills is one of the prime aims of an after-school activity. As the skills develop, the child’s self-esteem also increases.

After school activities are all about boosting a child’s sense of competence. Good and effective after school activities promotes the resilience of youth and encourages them to grow stronger, be it mentally, emotionally or physically.

Safety is one of the first requirements of an after-school activity. The staff should be qualified, adequate and alert. Never put your child in a program where safety is a matter of accident instead of a matter of priority. The staff should be friendly and should have a positive relationship with the child. Therefore, the program should have professional and trained staff that loves to interact with children. The program should maintain a cooperative and supportive attitude and a structured environment. Participation and collaboration as opposed to competition and antagonism must be encouraged.

Some programs involve the children in planning activities and making decisions. Adults often forget to get the opinion of their children. By giving the children an opportunity to voice their opinion, programs become fun activities that children are motivated to participate in. Young people thrive when they are listened to, respected and allowed to contribute their mite.

Routine evaluations are an important part of after school programs. If the child does not benefit from a class, don’t waste time being over-optimistic. Try something new.

You are now ready to look for the perfect after school activity for your child. But don’t let us forget that having fun is also an important part of growing up. The child deserves a few hours of pure delight.

Remember, all work and no play, ……

X